Relationship Rules

Do you ever feel like a part of your life has stagnated?  Have you stopped doing something you love.  Stopped asking for what you want?  In the busy lives we lead, just doing what needs to be done takes up a lot of our time.  Making time for what we want must be accomplished on purpose—and with purpose.

Take a moment and ask yourself what have you kept yourself from doing.  What have you denied yourself because you didn’t take the time?  Remember back on how it made you feel when you did make time.  Maybe it was when you were in an exercise routine or when you spent time in daily meditation.  Was it a hobby you loved?  Allow that memory to come to life in your mind.

Are you willing to recommit to your desire?  Find that place inside you that knows no regret  I bet you can.  Once you find that place inside yourself, go get a drink of water.  Drink it and imagine yourself watering your dream.  It will grow, especially if you tend to it often.

Happy Spring-happy rebirth.

There is a plan for each and every one of us. We are not randomly put here in this place at this time to just exist. We have many purposes for being here. We have much to experience and an unlimited potential to grow and expand.

Sometimes it may feel like we are just existing, just going through the motions, doing what we need to do, have to do, and ignoring the things we want to do. Even at those times, there is a divine plan at work in our lives. Knowing this, we can relax and give up feeling the need to be in control.

The best way to alieviate stress is to do something nice for someone. Pay an unexpected compliment, thank someone for their efforts, give something away. Your kind words or a hug can make such a difference in someone’s life. Our giving is reciprocal, and to the degree that it affects another, it affects us too.

As you go through your day, be aware of divine timing. Acknowledge it. Don’t discount it as just a coincidence. Let it confirm for you that all things happen in their own time and in their own way, and many times better than we could have ever imagined.

December has been a busy month and many of us encountered stressed out or impatient people. Maybe we were impatient ourselves. We know we should take time to relax but we keep our nose to the grindstone, and our relationships and bodies take the brunt of it. In the process, we can lose site of our priorities — the very reasons why we work so hard.

Right now think of something that brings you joy. Hold that thought and take in a deep breath. Exhale any worrisome thoughts. Take in three deep breaths using this technique. Can you feel the difference? Are you more relaxed? And it took less than one minute.

Here’s another way to use this technique: Think a thought of gratitude. The one I like to use is, “My body is healthy and strong. I am grateful for my health.” While holding that thought, breathe in deeply. Exhale while imagining any stress leaving your body through your breath.

Why not add this to your list of new year’s resolutions? It is easy to do and it only take a minute.

May 2008 be your best year yet!

We are born with a need to belong, to feel connected. We are born with the need to feel loved and the desire to love another. This holiday season is a sacred time and within it a special opportunity for you to express your feelings.

Whenever we speak kindly with someone, when we touch another affectionately, we are bonding and satisfying our deepest need to belong. How can you feel a sense of belonging? Extend yourself to another. Pay a compliment, bring someone a warm drink, tell someone you care even if you think they already know. Help someone feel included by extending an invitation to join you and your family. These are all ways to nurture yours and others need to belong.

Maybe your beloved needs to be reminded they are an important part of your life. They may be patiently waiting for you say, “I love you” this holiday season. As women, we have a need to hear the words, it just isn’t romantic if we ask. As men, we forget how important this is to the woman we love.

Whenever when you lovingly include others in your life, you truly are spreading holiday cheer!

One of the interesting things about making mistakes is we usually know when we have made a mistake. We have a little talk with ourselves and commit to do better next time. The trouble is, once we walk in the door  to greet our partner (or another), and they notice our mistake, often  they feel a need to bring it to our attention. This creates a double whammie.  Now we are hit from the left and the right.

As human beings, we don’t go around announcing our mistakes. Who wants to be in the dog house?  Generally, we already put ourself there when we realized we messed up.  Having someone tell us what we did wrong, in detail, we feel even worse.  We certainly don’t feel close to this person.  The truth is, inside was are sorry and would like to be forgiven.

Recall a time when you were let off the hook? Do you remember feeling relieved?  Were you accepted for who you are? Now it is your turn.

Fall into forgiveness. Let someone off the hook. You’ll feel better about yourself, and that special someone will appreciate not being called on their mistake, even if they don’t say so. All around it is a win-win for you both — forgiveness always is.