The best way to receive is to give.  Today, show someone you approve of them, you accept them for who they are.  Tell them they don’t have to change–that you love them no matter what happens.  Tell your children you are glad they were born.  Give a compliment to a stranger or a child.  Then go look in the mirror and tell yourself the same thing.  See yourself as a person who deserves the best of everything. Notice how good it feels.  Make this a daily habit and see your life change.

Use Spring, this time of rebirth, to let yourself blossom.  Allow your personality to be heard and seen and know you are loved.

When we are under stress, we are donating our precious time and energy to something that will never serve us. Our thoughts contaminate our mind telling us we are not good enough, not deserving.  Our body doesn’t feel like moving much. We miss out on the opportunity to be happy and to make other happy. Our attention and focus are debilitating, rather than liberating.

What do you want for your life? Are you building your character?  Are you encouraging others? Are you giving of yourself as only you can?  Don’t blame your circumstances, change them.  Don’t blame your partner, change your attitude.  Don’t beat yourself up, change your mindset.  As a wise person said, “It is not our circumstances that make us miserable, it is our thoughts about our circumstances.”

Declare who you are and who you will be — I am successful, kind, loving, strong, giving, safe, loved, healthy, and wise.  Use the words that feel the best for you. Say them out loud. Say them in front of the mirror.  Say them boldly and with passion.  Your reality is determined by your thoughts and words.  Choose them wisely.

Your whole life has prepared you for who you now define yourself to be.  Your past has prepared you for today.  How do you define yourself?  Inside of you is strength and vision.  Instead of reacting to that person or situation, stop.  First, decide how you want to react.  Your reaction will determine what happens next.

Even though unfair things happen to us and we can’t find a “good enough” explanation, remember in time, things work together for our good. We don’t always know what is the bigger picture is for our life.  Remind yourself everyday to look for the good in your life.  Look for the good in others.  As you do, your focus will become more positive. You will see goodness naturally because you have trained your mind to do so.  As a result, your choices will model your positive attitude.  When that happens, your mere presence will motivate others.

Do you ever feel like a part of your life has stagnated?  Have you stopped doing something you love.  Stopped asking for what you want?  In the busy lives we lead, just doing what needs to be done takes up a lot of our time.  Making time for what we want must be accomplished on purpose—and with purpose.

Take a moment and ask yourself what have you kept yourself from doing.  What have you denied yourself because you didn’t take the time?  Remember back on how it made you feel when you did make time.  Maybe it was when you were in an exercise routine or when you spent time in daily meditation.  Was it a hobby you loved?  Allow that memory to come to life in your mind.

Are you willing to recommit to your desire?  Find that place inside you that knows no regret  I bet you can.  Once you find that place inside yourself, go get a drink of water.  Drink it and imagine yourself watering your dream.  It will grow, especially if you tend to it often.

Happy Spring-happy rebirth.

Sometimes it may feel like we are just existing, just going through the motions, doing what we need to do, have to do, and ignoring the things we want to do. Even at those times, there is a divine plan at work in our lives. Knowing this, we can relax and give up feeling the need to be in control.

The best way to alieviate stress is to do something nice for someone. Pay an unexpected compliment, thank someone for their efforts, give something away. Your kind words or a hug can make such a difference in someone’s life. Our giving is reciprocal, and to the degree that it affects another, it affects us too.

As you go through your day, be aware of divine timing. Acknowledge it. Don’t discount it as just a coincidence. Let it confirm for you that all things happen in their own time and in their own way, and many times better than we could have ever imagined.

December has been a busy month and many of us encountered stressed out or impatient people. Maybe we were impatient ourselves. We know we should take time to relax but we keep our nose to the grindstone, and our relationships and bodies take the brunt of it. In the process, we can lose site of our priorities — the very reasons why we work so hard.

Right now think of something that brings you joy. Hold that thought and take in a deep breath. Exhale any worrisome thoughts. Take in three deep breaths using this technique. Can you feel the difference? Are you more relaxed? And it took less than one minute.

Here’s another way to use this technique: Think a thought of gratitude. The one I like to use is, “My body is healthy and strong. I am grateful for my health.” While holding that thought, breathe in deeply. Exhale while imagining any stress leaving your body through your breath.

Why not add this to your list of new year’s resolutions? It is easy to do and it only take a minute.

May 2008 be your best year yet!

Whenever we speak kindly with someone, when we touch another affectionately, we are bonding and satisfying our deepest need to belong. How can you feel a sense of belonging? Extend yourself to another. Pay a compliment, bring someone a warm drink, tell someone you care even if you think they already know. Help someone feel included by extending an invitation to join you and your family. These are all ways to nurture yours and others need to belong.

Maybe your beloved needs to be reminded they are an important part of your life. They may be patiently waiting for you say, “I love you” this holiday season. As women, we have a need to hear the words, it just isn’t romantic if we ask. As men, we forget how important this is to the woman we love.

Whenever when you lovingly include others in your life, you truly are spreading holiday cheer!

One of the interesting things about making mistakes is we usually know when we have made a mistake. We have a little talk with ourselves and commit to do better next time. The trouble is, once we walk in the door  to greet our partner (or another), and they notice our mistake, often  they feel a need to bring it to our attention. This creates a double whammie.  Now we are hit from the left and the right.

As human beings, we don’t go around announcing our mistakes. Who wants to be in the dog house?  Generally, we already put ourself there when we realized we messed up.  Having someone tell us what we did wrong, in detail, we feel even worse.  We certainly don’t feel close to this person.  The truth is, inside was are sorry and would like to be forgiven.

Recall a time when you were let off the hook? Do you remember feeling relieved?  Were you accepted for who you are? Now it is your turn.

Fall into forgiveness. Let someone off the hook. You’ll feel better about yourself, and that special someone will appreciate not being called on their mistake, even if they don’t say so. All around it is a win-win for you both — forgiveness always is.

Resisting what is happening, versus what we want, will only intensify those negative feelings. Don’t fight what isn’t working. Don’t waste precious time by making a list of why you are right or why it should be different. Instead, just for a moment, try to look at it from another perspective. Is there another way of looking at this problem? How could it be different than how you are perceiving it? When you can, practice the art of non-resistance.

Do you ever notice that when you reflect back on the hardest times of your life, that was when you experienced the most growth? It was what made you stronger, it humbled you, and molded you into the person you are today. Celebrate that. Give yourself a pat on the back. You are still here………..and you’ve come a long way, baby!