Relationship Rules

Are you happy with how you spend your time?   Everyday we are gifted with 24 hours.  We decide how to use that time.  We need to eat regularly.  We require an appropriate number of hours of sleep, and then there are the things that have to be done.

Is there something you would like to include in your daily or weekend routine?  The first step is committing to giving time to yourself.  Taking care of yourself is the first step to knowing what you want and what you don’t want.  Once you know what you want, you can stop giving time to what you don’t want.

Make your happiness a priority.  When you are happy the people around you will notice.  They will want to be around you.  Your attitude of happiness will rub off on others and will motivate you to want to be happy.

New scienfic studies show we are actually hardwired to feel good, to live longer and to help others.  Helping other and giving have their own reward.

Here’s how you can benefit from giving.
Science discovered:

1.  Those who learn the power of giving in their teen experience improved physical and mental health.
2.  People who volunteer live longer, even after sifting out age, gender, exercise, smoking and eating habits.
3.  Giving produces a sense of belonging.
4. Stress levels are reduced when we know we’ve helped another.
5.  Giving helps us forgive ourselves, which is necessary for having healthy self-esteem.
6.  Negative emotions like anger, jealousy, blame are reduced when we give.
7.  Giving creates healthy bodies.

Here’s my challenge to you.  What can you give away?  What can you do for someone that no one else can do?  Pick a day and give three things away to three people.  You choose the gift.  Give to three people in one day.

Here are some ideas.  Give a compliment to someone who doesn’t expect it.  Give a flower to someone you love.  Who would love some of your time and attention?  Or how about all that stuff you haven’t used or touched for years.  What can you give away?

Give three things to three people in one day and see how you feel.  I can guarantee you will want to do it again and again.  I’d love to hear your story, so write me and share!

Stormy walks past firefighters clearing burned items from a house fire on Inca Parkway in Boulder on Thursday. Firefighters used a pet oxygen mask to help resuscitate the dog, the first time Boulder firefighters have used the tool. In his 13 years with the Boulder Fire Department, firefighter Mark Evans has had the unfortunate experience of carrying several dying dogs from scorched or burning homes.
When he carried a scruffy, unconscious dog from a partially

burnt south Boulder house — which caught fire when no residents were home Thursday — he and his partner had a new tool to help save Stormy. And it was on their truck because of two industrious Boulder teens.
Evans and his partner, Lt. Donald Olguin, used a pet oxygen mask to help the dog survive, marking the first time the department has used the tool. The fire department received the masks Saturday, whenClara Grainger, 14, and Isabel Lippincott, 13, donated them with money made from crafting and selling beaded bracelets.
Evans said the mask made for a “very, very cool” rescue of a dog that “wasn’t doing very well” when they found it.
“We put the oxygen on and, after about 10 or 15 minutes, it was able stand up and act fairly normal,” he said.
Firefighters found the dog after a passerby called 911 to report a house fire at 725 Inca Parkway around 4:30 p.m. No one was home when firefighters arrived, but they heard a faint whimpering. They eventually found Stormy in an upstairs bedroom.
The fire department hasn’t determined a cause and said no one was injured at the house, owned by Charles N. Hoffman, according to Boulder County records. The dog’s owners didn’t want to be interviewed.
Clara and Isabel brought the masks to each station Saturday after they raised enough money for the life-saving tools, which cost about $100 each. They began their bead project last year after Boulder Fire Chief Larry Donner said the department likely wouldn’t have enough money to buy the masks.
Lafayette, Louisville and Superior bought masks last April.
The teens sold the bracelets — ranging from $1.50 to $10 — outside grocery stores and to friends and family members.
“We hoped they were going to be able to save animals — we just didn’t know it would be this soon,” said Clara, an eighth-grader at Boulder’s Southern Hills Middle School. “We were just glad we brought them this weekend, and not next weekend.”
Stormie the dog seemed fine Thursday afternoon as she watched firefighters go through her house, where the fire seemed mostly contained to the basement.
Isabel was elated to hear that the dog she and her friend helped save was not only alive but alert and mobile.
“It’s very exciting. We were at a loss for words when we found out,” the Horizons K-8 charter school seventh-grader said. “It’s so exciting to know we helped save an animal’s life.”

One desire we are all born with is the desire to be loved; to be accepted and appreciated for who we are.  When someone likes us, does business with us, or wants to spend time with us, it is because they are drawn to our personality.  We don’t have to change who we are to be acceptable, to be loved.  We are perfect just the way we are.  We can be ourself.

The best way to receive is to give.  Today, show someone you approve of them, you accept them for who they are.  Tell them they don’t have to change–that you love them no matter what happens.  Tell your children you are glad they were born.  Give a compliment to a stranger or a child.  Then go look in the mirror and tell yourself the same thing.  See yourself as a person who deserves the best of everything. Notice how good it feels.  Make this a daily habit and see your life change.

Use Spring, this time of rebirth, to let yourself blossom.  Allow your personality to be heard and seen and know you are loved.

Our personality is what makes us who we are—unique.  At any time, we are either contributing to our personality, or our character, either positively or negatively.  Positively contributing to our personality may be paying attention to our personal growth, nourishing our spiritual relationship, or being a positive role model for others.

When we are under stress, we are donating our precious time and energy to something that will never serve us. Our thoughts contaminate our mind telling us we are not good enough, not deserving.  Our body doesn’t feel like moving much. We miss out on the opportunity to be happy and to make other happy. Our attention and focus are debilitating, rather than liberating.

What do you want for your life? Are you building your character?  Are you encouraging others? Are you giving of yourself as only you can?  Don’t blame your circumstances, change them.  Don’t blame your partner, change your attitude.  Don’t beat yourself up, change your mindset.  As a wise person said, “It is not our circumstances that make us miserable, it is our thoughts about our circumstances.”

Declare who you are and who you will be — I am successful, kind, loving, strong, giving, safe, loved, healthy, and wise.  Use the words that feel the best for you. Say them out loud. Say them in front of the mirror.  Say them boldly and with passion.  Your reality is determined by your thoughts and words.  Choose them wisely.